Welcome back, and oh btw i'm Mrs. Adam J Kean

So it's been a while is quite the understatement, since thne last time I posted I was in a whirlwind of angst and in wedding season.. I believe someone asked me a about 6 months ago how many weddings did I end up attending in 2011.. We I believe the finaly count was 7. Then there was this phase of the when is it gonna be me-- this was a dark period and I fortunately God's grace and a big dose of humility gave me the strength to get through.. So what happens when you watch all your friends move on with their lives in the way of matrimony... well you cry a little-- focus on other things, climb mountains, and pray to God. On September 18th 2011, long awaited and definitely a surprise.. my dear sweet muffin Adam proposed to me... It was surreal...good but sureal... Yay!!! this is gonna be great. Not so much in the planning aspect but the finally going to continue my life with my soul mate aspect.

Well those who know me and have lived with me... patiently so I must add as I'm not the easiest person to live with... I have my quirks.. Well remember the part about how I attended so many weddings and after a while I was just tired of being an attender--- well during this kicking and screaming period of my life... I was pretty blind as to what God was trying to teach me with regards to patience...enter engaged season. Here I am excited to be engaged and yet again I'm kicking and screaming and crying and and hating the little details of planning a wedding.

Thought process of Astrid during wedding planning---
Initial Enjoyment... this does not truly wane though it has some low points when all I can think of is eloping with Adam.
So one month in... Venues, Dates, I'm not good at planning, This cost how much... what do you mean breakfast is weird for weddings, and oh wait this isn't really my wedding but a wedding for everyone else in my life...huh...answer courthouse, 2 witnesses and huge savings...( that didn't fly-- I'll post wedding pics later)

3 months down the road- Venue picked, caterer on board with breakfast, dress bought, bridesmaids chosen and dresses ordered, hell beginining

All those beautiful little details  that haunt you in the night and cause your body to transform in various forms of ulcerative pains... ( Background info... now those of you who know me, know I'm a heavy sleeper and won't wake up for anything. I've slept through tornadoes, earthquake-- these I don't even feel when i'm a awake.. so when I started having trouble sleeping I know this wedding thing was no good...so what got me from tossing and turning and digestion issues-- to a now married woman... Well when you're awake you can't help but think and pray..so that what I did... first I was in a selfish mode... praying about me and how this period of life sucked... then God smacked me and I realized I wasn't the only one having issues... So 3-4 or sometimes 5 o'clock was the waking hour(s) in which I would pray for everything...everything I could remember.. friends- unsaved, saved, roomies-- school issues, guy issues, the kids at church, Adam our relationship, little mo, dad, friends having babies, co-workers

This was a blessed time... tiring but mindful time. I hated the kicking and screaming portion but this unfortunately in some ways continued in more lesser strains.

Moving along it's been 6 months and to be honest... I checked out of planning and had to deal with a heavier load at work and the possibility of my boss being gone for months at a time and well doing both our jobs. This has yet to happen.. Pray for his mom, My boss's name is Christian and his mother is battling  cancer. During this time God has really given me opportunities to grow and encourage those around me... I must admit... it's hard to stay focused on God when you're anxious... so the remedy.. well in Matthew 6:25-34 ( God says don't be anxious... He has given us what we need..)
So huh God our great sovereign provider is telling me not to be anxious... well listen Astrid.. if you're going to encourage you better take a big heap of what God's giving and what you're passing onto others...

( Must insert this... I have a hard time excepting technology as a helpful source... even as I write this blog... I find that it is working against me) Could also be be because I'm writing this at 4 am

So to be continued... as I realize I need sleep to continue being able to post in a sane manner that doesn't have me screaming " Oh no, I just lost my post...waking my poor husband up wondering why I'm awake at this hour anyway... To bed.. More later